Thursday, July 5, 2007

Auto theft 101

Welcome to today's beginner class in auto theft.

This class will deal with the basic no-nos, things that are strongly suggested you do not do if you choose to embark in a career of illegal motor vehicle reallocations.

Today we will begin with a brief overview of several topics and we can expand upon them in later lessons.

1. It is always a good idea to understand the type of vehicle you are stealing. John Williamson witnessed a very good example of this outside the Marietta GA pizza restaurant he works in. Teenagers armed with a gun stole the wallet and the car keys from a man outside the pizza shop and then jumped into his Honda Accord to make their getaway in it seems.

"The kid was sitting in the car trying to start it but he had no idea what to do. He looked dumbfounded. The only thing he had going was the radio," according to Williamson.

Employees called the police and the teenagers were caught after they fled into the woods. Note: If they had known that the Accord had a standard transmission , added to the fact that they had no idea how to use one.. they probably should have avoided that getaway plan.

2. It is always best to not involve the police directly in your planned theft. Several examples of this line of poor decisions:

A Lakewood WA man appeared in Lakewood Municipal Court on a theft charge and was released by the judge, pending trial on the condition that he have law-abiding behavior and no similar incidents. He was back before the same judge 20 minutes later on another theft charge. It seems that immediately after his appearance, he walked across the street and attempted to steal a police bait car parked there. A simple rule of thumb...... courthouse = police presence.

Another good rule of thumb, it usually isn't wise to try and steal an occupied surveillance van. Two men in Greensboro NC tried just that though in May. Two police officers occupying the van watched as another car with two men pulled up. One of the men got out and shined a flashlight into the back of the van and directly into an officers face. He apparently didn't see the officer because he then attempted to open the van's rear door. Sgt. Dennis Willoughby did state that Rakama Johnson, 27, the flashlight wielder, had a pretty good shock when Willoughby jumped out and arrested him.

Lastly for today, as good an idea it seems at the moment, picking up the dropped keys to a police cruiser with the idea of using them isn't the best plan. A 16-year-old girl in San Antonio TX did just that though, in hopes of diverting the police from their foot pursuit of her boyfriend. She grabbed the keys off the ground, got in the car and took off, only to crash and roll it a short distance away. While it seems that stealing a police car will divert attention, it also will draw much more attention I think just from those flashing lights and emblems on the side.

In conclusion for today, it can be seen by the few examples presented...... auto theft can be a very complicated career choice..... and class, don't forget to hand in your writing assignment next time. " How I would like to foster world peace with random illegal car reallocations."

1 comment:

Kristian said...

It was funny! Now so many people can read you`r instruction for car thief, I will be attentive for my van! You must give instruction "Van sales"